Brave.

"You make me Brave, you call me out beyond the shore into the waves. You make me brave, no fear can hinder now the promises you've made."

This CD was given to me around Mother's Day by a dear friend. It has since become my anthem, my song I sing when I don't feel like I can be brave anymore. My hearts cry when everything around us is "bad news". If you are looking for inspired, uplifiting, encouraging, prophetic worship. GET THIS ALBUM. NOW.

We didn't ask for this journey. We were called into it. Unlike callings people feel they have on their life that they need to take action to pursue, we were not given choice. He called us into the waves, the storm, and He has made us brave. 

The dictionary defines brave as: 

Brave; (verb) Enduring or facing danger or pain, with no fear.

The no fear part is hard. The no fear part is hard when the future is uncertain. The no fear part is hard when you are consistently told by medical professionals that it doesn't look good, that your son will not survive. The no fear part is the most difficult part of 'being brave'.

Most days I don't feel brave. Most days I feel weary. I feel scared. I feel helpless watching my baby suffer. 

So what is brave to me? 

Brave to me is waking up daily and facing your child being so sick.

Brave is walking hospital corridors and sitting by his bedside for hours just so he knows I am there.

Brave is asking for help when we need it. (that is hard!)

Brave is having to trust God completely with your child's life. 

Brave is resuming normal life activities and facing the questions head on.

Another line of a song on this CD goes:

 "be still my soul and trust in Him, the waves and wind still know His name"

How amazing is that. The wind and waves still listen to Him. I know that He can heal my Malachi. I know that He is sovereign. I know that despite all we have been through, HE is good. 

And HE is the one who makes me Brave. He is the one who I cling to. He gives me the strength to face each new day. He gives me the endurance to fight for my baby. No matter what the outcome of our situation, I know my Malachi will be Ok. Because as God has made me brave, He makes Malachi brave. Brave to face more than any of us will ever face in our life. Brave to fight daily for his life. Brave to not give up, even when every odd is against him. 

Malachi is my hero. The bravery I see in him comes only from God and is my inspiration.